


milkshake and fries (better together)

by DreamBrother



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:07:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24614254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreamBrother/pseuds/DreamBrother
Summary: "You," Danny's finger draws a circle to encompass the six-foot-two Navy SEAL with bulging muffin cheeks, "you are telling me," the same finger motions to a five-foot-five baker extraordinaire that is one Daniel Williams, "that not only do you bake blueberry and white chocolate muffins but that they are better than mine?"Steve chews, Steve swallows.Steve nods. "Yes."
Relationships: Steve McGarrett/Danny "Danno" Williams
Comments: 38
Kudos: 162





	milkshake and fries (better together)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [justfandomthings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/justfandomthings/gifts).



> Dear justfandomthings, 
> 
> In November 2018 I signed up for the McDanno Holiday Gift Exchange 2018 having not written fanfic in about ten years. Your prompt was perfect to what I had in mind already, so I took it as a good sign. I didn't write much after that fic, but then coronavirus and lockdown happens, and from March 2020, writing for this fandom has kept me sane. So, knowing i was about to reach 100,000 words of H50 fanfic, I knew I wanted to celebrate reaching that milestone by writing a fic for you, hence me randomly asking for a prompt.
> 
> This isn't my best work, but I hope you like this small token of appreciation for being the person whose prompt and lovely comment on my first fic brought me here - I'm not sure how I would have gotten through the last few months without this fandom! Thank you, and to all the lovely people who've commented and engaged with my work these past few months, it is so highly appreciated. 
> 
> Enjoy!

At heart, Danny is a baker. Sifting flour, rolling dough, measuring out exact spoonfuls of batter into lined cupcake trays. Squeezing the icing bag with an exact, consistent pressure to have a perfect swirl each time, carefully sprinkling chocolate powder or doling out gold flakes sparingly to add that extra flair - all of it under Danny's control, under his careful, meticulous eye. 

Which explains why he is so unbelievably fucked off when Steve takes one bite of his blueberry and white chocolate muffins that he is making for the bake sale at Charlie's school and goes, "Hmm, nice. But mine are better."

"I'm sorry, the fuck you just say?" 

It was amusing to see Steve's eyes widen at Danny’s words even as he furtively looks over his shoulder to see if a little four-foot five-inch mini-Danny with impressionable ears has followed him into the kitchen. Amateur. As if Danny hadn't learned his lesson when three-year-old Grace had dropped paint all over her brand new dress her first day of nursery and yelled, "motherfucking shitwipe." 

"They're good, Danno," Steve says even as he takes another huge bite and the muffin that would normally take a normal person five or six bites to finish is demolished in two. "But mine are better," he adds, forcing Danny to jerk his head to the side before he gets a chunk of unchewed blueberry peel to the face as it comes flying out of Steve's mouth at the first opportunity for freedom. 

Danny would have sympathized with the blueberry peel had he not spent the last month regularly inspecting the inside of Steve's mouth with his own tongue. But he knows it's not for everyone. And it better not be for anyone else, if Danny has his way. 

"You," Danny's finger draws a circle to encompass the six-foot-two Navy SEAL with bulging muffin cheeks, "you are telling me," the same finger motions to the five-foot-five baker extraordinaire that is one Daniel Williams, "that not only do you bake blueberry and white chocolate muffins but that they are better than mine?" 

Steve chews, Steve swallows.

Steve nods. "Yes."

"Oh fuck off. You're lying."

"Get your son in here, I'll swear on his head. Mine are better."

"You leave my child outta this. One, there is no way you bake, and second, no way in hell that yours are better than mine."

"Fine. I'll prove it,” Steve says as he crumples up the muffin wrapper and lobs it towards the trash can. 

"This I’d like to see.”

"But on one condition."

"Here we go. What?" 

"We both make them, we make our ohana judge them blind. That way, I get the pleasure of you being proved wrong in front of everyone."

"And if I win?"

"What do you want?" 

Danny lazily runs his gaze up and down Steve’s body, biting back a smirk when it causes his partner to take an inadvertent step towards him before he stops himself. What they have between them, it’s new, but even though Steve had been the one to kiss him first, it’s Danny who has been oddly more comfortable with the idea of them together whilst Steve still seems in that dazed period of not quite believing that Danny kissed him back. "Actually, nothing,” he finally puts Steve out of his misery. “You being proved wrong in front of all our friends and family will be enough."

"So we're on?"

"Oh, we are so on, babe." 

Steve reaches for a second muffin and Danny has to close his eyes and remind himself that he loves this man, even if Steve is under the delusion that his muffins are better than Danny's, which stops him from reaching out and smacking Steve's hand away from the muffins. "But there be rules to this game, hotshot."

"You mean the rules you'll break the second you get a chance?" Danny asks. 

"Nope." Steve bites into the muffin, chewing once, twice, and then. "I'm gonna win fair and square so I don't have to hear you complaining for the next fifty years how I won by cheating." 

Danny refuses to let his heart be warmed by the fact that Steve is picturing them together fifty years from now. He needs to harden his heart, make it cold, like his hands when he makes pastry from scratch. 

"Fine," Danny says as he grabs a muffin for himself and hauls himself up on the counter space between the sink and the microwave. "Hit me," as he takes a huge bite, taking comfort in the fact that his partner and now lover has clearly been hit too hard on the head in recent years because no way could he improve on what Danny is currently eating. 

"Alright. One, we both make the exact same thing so it's a direct comparison."

“I thought we were seeing who made the best blueberry and white chocolate muffins.”

“Kono’s allergic to blueberries and she’ll kill us if she doesn’t get to be part of the judging.”

"That’s true. Fine, okay, then rule number two, no Hawaiian food. Even to win, I'm not using spam in my cooking."

"In which case, three, no Italian cooking. I'm not competing with your grandmother's lasagne recipe."

"Yeah, because she'd haunt your ass if you even think you have a chance of doing better." Danny glares at Steve when he reaches for a third muffin, pleased when Steve's hand freezer in mid-air and then retracts after a moment’s consideration. "Okay, four, no steaks. That's your thing, you can keep it."

"Fine. So we set?"

"We're set."

* * *

“Oh, this gonna be good.”

Kono looks up at Lou’s words, following his line of sight towards the doors just in time to see Steve and Danny walk in, each with a dishcloth covered plate of something in their hands with identical looks of focus on their face. It would be cute if it wasn’t also scary.

“Or bad. Could go either way, to be honest,” she murmurs even as she tries to read Danny’s expression to figure out if explosions are in the near future because if Danny can’t stop Steve, then no one can. Not that she minds explosions, but they tend to cause a lot of paperwork and she has a date night with Adam planned for tonight. 

“Five-O, gather around,” Steve calls out and Kono just has time to share an upturned eyebrow with Grover as Chin exits his office and comes to stand next to his cousin and Jerry looks up from where he’s been updating the tech table’s software.

“Right, Danny and I have a bet going” Steve begins, causing Grover to mutter an “Oh God” which Danny rewards with a smirk and a nod. Steve is undeterred, and adds: “You guys get to be the judge over who wins.”

“Oh no,” Chin mutters this time. 

“So this delusional animal here,” Danny says as he lightly punches Steve in the bicep causing the man to peer down his nose at him, “thinks he’s a better baker than me. So we’ve both made a chocolate cake,” Danny gestures to the covered plates still in their hands, “which we’ve going to leave next to the coffee machine.” He points towards the little kitchenette area. “All we’d like you to do is have a taste of both, and then come back here and tell us which one you preferred. That’s it.”

Kono snorts, earning her the stink eye from both Danny and Steve. As if it would be that simple when the egos of the two men in front of her were on the line. “And how do we know who baked which one?”

“Anonymous voting,” Steve replies. “One cake is on a blue plate, the red on a red plate. Only Danny and I need to know whose is on which one.” 

“Ooh, like the Matrix?” Jerry shrugs when all eyes turn on him. “You know… red pill or the blue pill? No? Come on guys, it’s a classic!”

“Anyway,” Danny says before Five-O get a mini-history lecture on sci-fi films of the late 90s, “Grab a cup of coffee, have a slice of each, you know, take a break. And then, uh, come to Steve’s office and you can tell us, honestly, which one you preferred. That’s it.”

“That’s it? And what does the winner get out of it?” Lou asks. 

“And if it’s sexual favors, we don’t need to know,” says Chin. 

“Oh if it’s sexual favors, then we definitely need to know,” Kono adds with a mischievous leer, a laugh bursting out of her when the formidable Commander Steve McGarrett’s cheek takes on a hint of pink even as Danny shoots her a proud wink. It had only been a fortnight since Steve and Danny’s foray into being partners in all meanings of the word had been revealed to the team, and Kono couldn’t have been happier for them, especially when she found out that alluding to Steve and Danny’s sex life made the Commander squirm. 

“The winner wins the argument, that’s it,” Steve reveals even as he elbows his partner in the ribs. “Come on, Danny.” 

“Uh, think I’m gonna sit this one out,” Lou announces to their retreating backs, “I promised Renee I’d cut down on sugar this month.”

“Oh yeah? So it wasn’t you I shared a bag of malasadas with yesterday?” Danny calls out even as he follows Steve towards the small kitchenette around the corner from all the offices. 

“Don’t think we’re escaping this, brah,” Chin says to Lou, clapping him on the shoulder. “In fact, I get the feeling this is just the beginning.”

_Twenty minutes later_

“And?” Steve doesn’t even wait until the whole team has filed into his office before he makes the demand. 

“Red or blue?” Danny asks after shooting his partner a look for his impatience. 

“Well…” Chin begins before turning to look at Lou.

“We all kinda…” 

“Yeah, it wasn’t just me,” Kono points out as she plants her butt on the arm of Danny’s chair, her proximity getting a raised eyebrow from Steve, causing Danny to smirk. 

“Oh for God’s sake guys, just spit it out,” demands Steve as he tears his eyes away from where Danny starts prodding Kondo’s knee. 

‘“Fiiiiiine.” Kono takes pity on her two bosses, though she refuses to move, shooting Lou, Chin and Jerry a quick wink before saying the magic words: “We liked the icing of the red one and the cake of the blue one.”

Both Danny and Steve throw their arms up in celebration before turning to each other confused.

“Why are you happy?” “Why are you happy?”

“I had the best icing, we all know the icing is the best part, so I win.”

“I had the best cake, and the bet was over who made the best chocolate CAKE, ergo, I win.”

“Cake without icing is like cocoa puffs without the filling, nobody’s eating that. I win.”

"That's bullshit. I knew you'd cheat, you're just try-."

"Boys!" Steve and Danny turn as one to face their teammates. 

"What?" Steve says, sullen. 

"Technically we get to decide as your judges, and as your judges, we declare this round a draw. Okay?" Chin says, ever the voice of reason even as he reaches out, grabs Kono by the arm and pulls his cousin towards him before Steve reaches his limit of tolerance of having someone so near his partner that isn’t him. 

There is a mutinous silence from Danny and Steve before they turn to each other and after a moment of eye contact which Kono can't even begin to translate into words, they both nod and then turn back to the team.

"Fine. We'll bring something else in, you guys can judge with that,” Steve says with a decisive nod. 

* * *

Three days later because soon after the chocolate cake discussion the team is pulled into a kidnapping case that has them running all over the island surviving on Chinese takeout and liters of coffee. Finally, on Friday morning, Kono, Chin, Lou, and Jerry all receive the same text as they're preparing to go into work:

[06:45] "Don't bring lunch. Danny and I are making sandwiches for you all."

And so, at lunchtime, Danny and Steve gather the team around and like parents doing the lunchbox for the kids in the morning, pull out one wrapped parcel after the other from one big bag, some wrapped in stripey yellow paper, others in polka dot green paper. 

"So, two sandwiches, try one of each color wrap. Jerry, the vegetarian ones have your name on it," Danny explains and he reaches out and grabs two sandwiches from each pile. "Steve and I will eat in his office so you guys can, you know, judge in peace.”  
  
With that, Danny grabs Steve by the bicep and drags his partner towards the office where Steve gives them all a look through the glass before closing the blinds.   
  
"Come on, let's get this over and done with," Lou says as he grabs a sandwich from the pile closest to him.   
  
Twenty minutes later, Jerry knocks on the door to Steve's office.   
  
"Hey Jer, where's everyone else?" Steve asks as he unscrews the cap off a bottle of water and takes a sip before passing it to Danny who does the same.   
  
"Uh, I got selected to be the spokesperson."  
  
"Okay… so what's the verdict?" Danny asks as he downs half the bottle and hands it back to his partner.   
  
"Before I say it, I just want you guys to remember that I'm the messenger, okay? And this is not my view, but the view of all of us,” Jerry says as he holds up both of his hands in a gesture of peace.   
  
"Spit it out, Ortega!"   
  
"Okay okay…" Jerry digs out a note from his pocket, clearing his throat as he begins reading out: "Dear Steve and Danny, thank you both for lunch, it was delicious. After much thought and consumption of all of the sandwiches, we all agree that we prefer the bread of the green sandwiches and the filling of the yellow. We even combined the two and found that the combined sandwich was far superior to the two individual ones. You have our permission to make these sandwiches regularly for us. Mahalo."  
  
"Oh for god's sake!" Steve crumples the plastic bottle in his hand, causing Jerry to flinch in fear. 

"You can't be serious."  
  
"Sorry guys, but it's the truth,” Jerry shrugs.   
  
"That's it, we are expanding the judging pool,” Steve says to Danny who nods.   
  
"Yeah, these guys are cowards."  
  
Which is why, ten days later, the team are having lunch at Kamekona's shrimp truck with Max also present, when Steve leaves the table just as they're finishing up, goes to his car and comes back with two Tupperware containers, one with an orange lid and the other with pink.   
  
"Oh no," Kono mutters, the first to realize what's about to happen.  
  
"What?" Chin follows his cousin's gaze. "Here we go again."  
  
"I'm afraid I do not follow why you both seem disturbed," Max says.  
  
"Ignore them, Max. Steve and I just made brownies yesterday and we'd like you guys to try them, do a little taste test, nothing major."  
  
"Sure, nothing major, just each of your egos on the line,” Lou says. “If I get diabetes from all this, I’m sending you the doctor’s bill.”  
  
This time, Danny and Steve stay to watch the taste test and even more, refuse to let the team say a word.   
  
"Okay, let’s start with Kamekona. Kame, which one did you prefer?"  
  
"Hmm. That's a hard one, McGarrett. I liked both."  
  
"I'm sure you did. But if you had to pick just one…?"   
  
"I liked the taste of this one," Kamekona said, pointing to the orange box. "But the texture and fudginess of this one," he said, pointing to the pink, smiling when McGarrett glared at him.   
  
"Commander, I feel similarly except I preferred the taste of the pink one and texture of the orange,” Max said, looking at Kono, Chin, and Lou when they burst into giggles. “What’s so funny?”  
  
"Ignore them, Max. Should I even bother asking you guys?" Danny turned to the rest of the team, only to get a mix of replies echoing Kamekona’s and Max’s comments. “Now what?” Danny turns to his partner with a sigh, slightly discomfited by his “imma fix this” face. 

“I have an idea,” Steve replies, resulting in groans from around the table. 

“Oh great. Now you’ve woken the beast.” 

* * *

It’s Saturday evening, a cool breeze making itself known as the sounds of laughter fill the air on the McGarrett property. Fairy lights have been strung up in the backyard and the large dining table has been brought out on the lawn, chairs both wooden and plastic dotted around. Chin, Kono, Adam, Jerry, Kamekona, Max, and even Duke, are seated around the table enjoying the warm but breezy evening whilst Grace and Will lounge on the two deckchairs by the shoreline under the watchful eye of Lou.

A piercing whistle interrupts the conversation and all heads turn towards where Charlie is decked out in smart trousers and collared shirts with one of Danny’s old ties around his neck with a perfect Windsor knot. Next to him stands Eric, the source of the whistle. 

“Go on, buddy,” Eric says, squeezing his young cousin’s shoulder. 

Charlie clears his throat and with a big smile that does much to dispel the air of nervousness around him, announces, “Welcome to the McGarrett-Williams cook-off. Danno and Uncle Steve are gonna cook for ya, three times each they said. Eric and I bring out the plates, and you just gotta circle the food you liked, Danno says.” Charlie looks up at his cousin in confirmation who nods and pulls out a wedge of printed cards which he hands out to everyone. 

“Good work, kiddo. Give me five!" The two exchange high-fives and leg it to the kitchen when they hear Danny holler at them to hurry up. 

"Ain't McGarrett afraid that Charlie and Eric will cheat so that Williams wins?" Duke asks in a whisper to Lou, the weeks-old bet between the two leaders of a task-force now a well-known fact amongst their ohana. 

"Eric is petrified of Steve and Charlie loves his uncle too much to help his dad cheat. Besides, Danny will wanna win fair and square," Lou replied even as Charlie and Eric return to the table with plates in their hand, Charlie holding one, Eric holding four in a callback to his teenage job of being a waiter in a diner. “Hey, Will, Grace, get back here, food time!” Lou hollers in the direction of the teenagers. 

The three-course meal is nothing short of a marathon. For starters, Steve and Danny pay homage to Charlie and Grace’s favorite food, mac and cheese, except both men have elevated it to a different level. One offering is lobster mac and cheese with a roux-based sauce topped generously with cheddar and Parrano cheese to make it extra tangy which has Adam asking Eric to bring him back seconds, with the other being a french onion soup-style mac and cheese which has Kamekona stealing Max’s portion before the medical examiner has had more than two bites. 

The main course is Steve and Danny’s noodle-off, with one option being aubergine and mango soba noodles served with a side of grilled halloumi to balance the sweetness of the fruit with the saltiness of the Cypriot cheese, with result in Kono and Chin fighting out who gets the last portion. The competing offering is udon noodles with prawns and orange nam jim, over which Lou and Duke both take one bite and then sit back as though they’ve just experienced a taste of heaven. 

And then last but not least, dessert. Will and Grace are dispatched to the kitchen to tell Steve and Danny that their guests need a break before they burst only to return with the message that since both men attempted home-made ice cream, the delay is graciously granted so their ice-creams have a bit more time to set. 

It’s too soon yet not soon enough when Charlie and Eric are summoned to bring out the last of the courses, and Grace’s favorite dessert: a massive sundae with two types of ice cream, bits of brownie and waffle cone, caramel pieces and shards of almond providing the bite and crunch under a generous helping of chocolate sauce. 

“What’s the second option?” Kono asks Eric when he sits down and starts digging into his sundae.

The Jersey man shrugs even as he stuffs his mouth with a huge spoonful of ice cream and brownie. “This is it. McGarrett and Uncle D combined what they were gonna do. Uncle D’s brownie fucked up so McGarrett offered to share his, and McGarrett kept burning his caramel so Uncle D did it for him, so we got this one big sundae instead of two different ones.” 

Kono smiled at this revelation, looking across the table to her cousin who also had a similar smile on his face. 

Everyone’s just finishing up their dessert when Steve and Danny walk out of the kitchen to cheers and whistles and applause. Both men’s aprons are covered in a variety of stains and as a collective, no one chooses to mention the chocolate sauce streaked across one of Danny’s cheek and on the corner of Steve’s lips.

Lou rises out of his seat and lifts his beer even as Steve and Danny take seats at the head of the table. “On behalf of our ohana gathered here today, I’d like to raise a toast, and with my lovely assistants here, reveal the results of tonight’s cook-off.” Lou waves his hand to where Grace and Will have gathered everyone’s cards and tallied up the votes. 

“Oh God, we’re going to be here forever,” Steve mutters into Danny’s ear who shoots him a quick smile. 

Lou wisely ignores the two men and continues: “First, can I say on behalf of everyone here, that you two are the craziest SOBs I’ve ever had the pleasure to work and dine with.”

“Hear hear,” Jerry says, raising his own beer.

“Hey, I’m not crazy, don’t categorize me with this maniac,” Danny protests even as his words are drowned out by laughter from the rest of the team. 

“Second, on behalf of my trousers, please can this be the last of the McGarrett-Williams cook-off? My waistline can’t take the double meals and treats, and I can’t be spending money on new clothes when I’ve got two kids to put through college, man” Lou says once the laughter stops. 

“Yeah, I’m having to go surfing for an extra half-hour every morning and that’s eating into my sleep time,” Kono adds, her words causing the others to offer their own additions to their exercise regimen since the bet began. 

“And so, without further adieu,’ Lou shoots Steve a glare when the man mutters ‘finally’ under his breath, “the result of the latest tomfoolery between the two of you.” Lou holds his hands out for the folded piece of paper that his son hands him. “And the winner is… drumroll please…”

The ohana obliges, tapping their hands and beer bottles on the wooden table, Charlie and Eric adding to the noise by stamping their feet.

“And the winner is,” Lou repeats out the drumroll… “Neither of you.”

Steve and Danny’s cries of dismay are lost amongst the laughter from the rest of the team. 

“This is fixed, you guys are conspiring together so we keep feeding you,” Danny accuses, looking towards his daughter. “Grace, I thought you’d be an honest judge.”

“Sorry Danno,” she replies with a smile, “The numbers don’t lie. You both had equal votes for your starters and main, and the dessert doesn’t count.”

“That sundae was the best I ever had, though, it was spectacular,” Jerry adds.

“Yeah, and Renee wants you both to make her a chocolate cake for her birthday if you combine the cake of one of you, and the icing of the other,’ Lou says. 

“Adam and I were hoping you’d bring the sandwiches with the bread of one and the filling of the other to our housewarming party, actually,’ Kono says even as Adam hands Steve and Danny a fresh beer as the conversation turns away from the bet to discussing Kono and Adam’s new home. 

“You hear what I hear, Danno?” Steve asks even as he reaches out and pulls Danny’s chair closer towards him, his voice soft enough so that only his partner can hear his words. 

“What? That our friends are too scared to tell us the truth because our egos are too fragile?” Danny reaches out and wraps his fingers around Steve’s wrist.

“No. What I’m hearing is that we’re both good cooks but…”

“But what?”

“But if we combine our talents, we’re unstoppable,” Steve finishes, a slight blush on his face even as his eyes reveal the sincerity in his words. 

“You’re such a goof,” Danny replies with a smile. “Still think this is a massive conspiracy though,” he mutters even as he tightens his grip on Steve’s wrist in silent acceptance of his words. 

“Don’t worry, Danno, I’ll make sure there’s a winner tonight,” Steve leans over to whisper into his partner’s ear, causing a shiver to travel up Danny’s spine. 

Danny turns to face his partner more fully. “I’m already a winner babe, have been for the past two months,” he says, waiting until the meaning of his words finally get through to his partner before he leans over and kisses Steve for the first time in front of all their friends and family. 

**Author's Note:**

> The prompt:
> 
> _"Steve and Danny are always competing with each other over something, that's just how they are, and a big topic of debate is always, who is the better cook. Well, one seemingly harmless comment of "This is good but you haven't tried mine" sparks a full-on battle between McDanno to establish who is the better chef. The next team dinner, they have to prepare the same meal for dinner (of your choosing) to serve to the team- to be judged by their teammates (and Kamekona, Charlie, and anyone else you want to include, ofc). Double points if an unbiased third party (or something of the like) serves the meal so the team won't know who made what dish"_


End file.
